2010 - Year in Review

For me, 2010 was a year of excitement, challenges, opportunities, new adventures, making new friends, and getting reacquainted with old ones.
In January, I was named President of the South Fork Chamber of Commerce; which was a great joy and challenge at the same time. There is so much time, work, and dedication that goes into a position like that. It was an honor to serve this year as the Chamber President. I also began my Master's degree in Community Counseling at Adams State College. This was a challenge in itself since I was working full-time, have a child, and volunteering in my community; however, I managed to finish my first semester with all A's and kept a 4.0 GPA until this last semester, when it dropped to a 3.77 because of two B's.
In February, I celebrated the 1 year Anniversary of my florist and wedding consulting business, Gifts from the Heart Florist. The first year of the business was interesting and required a great deal of trial and error, but I made it and had a great 2010. 
On May 29th, I married my husband (after 4 years of dating) in a riverside ceremony at the Lazy Su-Z Ranch. Our wedding day brought an amuzing challenge, which was the result of the Rio Grande peaking the morning of the wedding. The river created a moat around our ceremony location, but with a little ingenuity, the groomsmen built a bridge over the water and all was well. Other than a little wind, which made for some pretty cool photos, the weather was perfect. We were blessed to have so many great friends and family members come to help us prepare for the day and celebrate with us. After a wonderful celebration with family and friends, we headed to the Bahamas for our honeymoon (my first out of the states trip). I loved it!!! The beach was beautiful, the weather was great, and we had a wonderful time...after I got over being upset about losing my new husband's real estate camera on a public bus in downtown Nassau. We made it through that ordeal without fighting, so I think we're good. (LOL) We also had an amazingly interesting beginning of the trip before we even left the states. We stayed the night before our flight at a hotel near DIA. My husband is an avid hunter and fly fisherman, so he was super excited when we met Patrick Sebile (CEO of Sebile Lures) in front of the hotel while waiting for the shuttle. What was ironic was that we have a friend with his own fishing show on World Fishing Network and this friend had scheduled Patrick (Mr. Sebile) to come to South Fork to fish with him and my husband the following month. After arriving at the airport, we ran into my Pastor and some church members who were leaving that morning for a trip to Europe and then, my favorite part....while waiting for our connecting flight from DIA to the Bahamas during our layover in Charlotte, NC, we met Snoop Dogg! He was waiting for a different flight in our terminal. It was pretty cool.
June was a very busy month, playing catch up from the wedding, getting back into school for the summer semester, and celebrating birthdays. My husband and daughter share the same birthday and mine is just five days later. Needless to say, June is a very busy month for our family.
July was busy as always with our local events that I am involved in because of chamber: 4th of July and Logger Days. Then there is always Ski-Hi Stampede, where we enjoyed watching Clay Walker perform. We always look forward to "Stampede"...good music and lots of dancing...oh, and the professional rodeo.
In August, my baby girl started Kindergarten. I can't believe she is already old enough to be in school. She has gained so much knowledge this year and has the best Kindergarten teacher ever (and I'm not just saying that b/c she is one of my good friends). My little girl is reading, doing math, and knows so much more than I did as a Kindergartener. I'm so proud of her. I also started my toughest semester yet, but pulled through it with better grades than I anticipated, so I was really excited about that. I was honored with the title of Mrs. San Luis Valley 2011 and will be the first representative from my area to compete in the Mrs. Colorado Pageant in March. I chose to hold a platform based on Domestic Violence Awareness, as you know from my blogs and website.
September was a busy wedding month for me and is one of my favorite months here in Southern Colorado. The end of September/beginning of October brings crisp air and beautiful fall foilage. I love getting in a jeep or the truck and riding around looking at all the colors on the mountains. It's absolutely beautiful. Sometimes you forget what a wonderful place you live in, but Fall in the mountains brings everything back into perspective.
October was a busy month, as I began promoting my platform. October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, so it was a great time to get started. I interviewed with KSLV Radio about my platform, spoke to Del Norte Rotary and Val Alto Study Club on Domestic Violence, I read to Mrs. Duda's Kindergarten Class, and participated in the Adams State College and Del Norte High School Homecoming Parades; as well as hosted a "Paint It Purple" party in my home. In between all this, I found time at the end of the month go head back to Texas for my high school homecoming. It was great to reconnect with some old friends that I'd like to keep in touch with. We also had a great time celebrating Halloween. My daughter loves Wizards of Waverly and was a Sorceror, my husband was Brett Michaels and I was Lady Gaga. I love dressing up, so it was a lot of fun.
November and December are always slow business wise and is a great time to enjoy family and friends during the holidays. November brought mid-terms and December finals for school. I'm glad those are over. In November, I was honored with my second nomination in a row for Citizen of the Year. It is nice to have my efforts recognized and I appreciate it, there are others; however, who do a great deal in the community and who fail to get recognized because they are not in the public spotlight and I think those are our true Citizens of the Year. December ended my first year of Grad School and as I stated before, I ended the year with mostly A's, two B's and a 3.77 GPA...not a 4.0, but I guess I can't complain. It was great to see my nieces (3), nephews (2), and sister-in-laws over the Christmas holiday and to celebrate Christmas with my husband and daughter as a family. Christmas Eve consisted of a nice family dinner at home and then a desert (Bananas Foster) with some friends. Christmas day was a day of relaxation after opening gifts that morning and then dinner and more gifts at my parent's that night. My child is so spoiled, it is unbelievable. All she wanted for Christmas was a lady bug pillow pet; which my mom bought for her. She was very disappointed that Santa didn't bring her one or that dad and I didn't buy her one. My mom finds it amusing to hold the best gift for last, so my little one was very excited when the last gift to be opened was a lady bug pillow pet. Santa did bring her lady bug slippers to go with her pillow pet though.
Looking back, 2010 has been a pretty good year and am already making plans for 2011....starting my second year in Grad School (which includes internships), celebrating my 1 year Anniversary, building a new house with my husband, Mrs. Colorado, and more platform work. I am hoping that 2011 brings love, joy, happiness, prosperity, and success to each and every one of you. Hope you had a great 2010 and best wishes for 2011.

With Love,
Heather Meyer
Mrs. San Luis Valley 2011
 

Stuffed Stocking Gala & Auction

On Saturday, December 4th, 2010 I will be modeling auction items for the Annual Stuffed Stocking Gala & Auction at the Ruth Marie Center in Del Norte. For those not familiar with the Stuffed Stocking Gala, this is a formal event held every year during the holiday season to benefit La Vereda Foundation (this is the foundation that oversees the Ruth Marie Building), Rio Grande Headwaters & Landtrust (RiGHT), and the Del Norte Chamber of Commerce.

Tickets are on sale ahead of time, $15 for adults and $5 for children under 12, by calling 719-850-2617 or may be purchased at the door. There will be food, a wine bar, beer, child care available and a designated driver will be provided for those who would like to take advantage of this. Viewing of the auction items will begin at 6:30 p.m. and the auction is set to start at 7:00 p.m.

For more information, you can call Barbara at 719-852-2617 or visit http://www.theruthmarie.com/.

Hope to see you on the 4th for this fun evening.

Statistics May Be Low

Stastically, it is said that 1 in 4 women will experience an abusive relationship in their lifetime. I think this is only the number of women who have reported an abusive relationship and that these numbers may actually be a great deal higher than previously thought.

Since I began promoting Domestic Violence Awareness in October, I have come to realize that there are more and more women out there who have experienced a violent dating relationship or marriage. I have had people that I have known for years come forward and say I had a boyfriend who was abusive, I had a husband who was abusive. It seems like over half of the women I know or am friends with have experienced abuse on some level. Could the statistic of 1 in 4 be low and actually be closer to 50% of women? Just wondering since it seems like I know or have met so many women who have experienced some level of abuse. Maybe the 1 in 4 statistic is for physical abuse and does not take into account the other forms of abuse.

Don't forget that abusive is not only physical, it can also be emotional and mental. I have a friend who went through an emotionally abusive relationship and no one ever knew. I experienced abuse on a number of levels in various relationships, not just one. We as women have to stand up for ourselves and gain the courage to leave those relationships that are or may be abusive. No one deserves to be abused and the abuse is never your fault be it physical, mental or emotional. If you are in an abusive relationship, create an escape plan and get out. If you need help getting out you can contact Tu Casa in the San Luis Valley at 719-589-2465, The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233, or your local police or sheriff's department. Help is out there. Don't be too afraid to reach for it.

Mrs. San Luis Valley & Mrs. Claus - Canned Food Drive

Hi all,
Just wanted to share something really exciting that I am involved with this holiday season. Peggy Hall, known throughout the San Luis Valley as Mrs. Claus, has asked for my help in collecting food and winter accessories for needy families in the San Luis Valley (Creede to Alamosa). Peggy and her husband Jim have been acting as Santa & Mrs. Claus for the last 13 years. During the holiday season, they collect toys through a toy drive and then distribute them to children in towns throughout the Valley. Children come to tell their Christmas wishes to Santa and Mrs. Claus gives them a gift then and there. This has been a great experience for both Jim & Peggy and the children of the Valley.

This year, Peggy has also recognized a need in the Valley and has found 10 families (2 in each town: Creede, South Fork, Del Norte, Monte Vista, and Alamosa) that are need of some help this holiday season. She has asked me to help her with a canned food and winter accessory food drive.

On Friday, December 10th from 5 p.m. - 7 p.m., we will be at the South Fork Visitor Center in South Fork collecting winter accessories (scarves, hats, gloves, mittens, etc.) and canned food to build a "Tree of Love" during the South Fork Visitor Center open house. I will be there to take pictures with, sign autographs and answer any questions that you may have about the drive, the Mrs. Colorado Pageant, or domestic violence. Santa will arrive at 7 p.m. to hear all the boys and girls Christmas wishes and I will be helping him distribute toys to the children.

If you have questions about the food drive ahead of time, please call Josephine at the South Fork Visitor Center 719-873-5512 or email me at mrsslv2010@hotmail.com. Help us help make this Christmas special for some Valley families in need. We hope to see you there!

Emotional Abuse (Abuse is not just physical)

I found this website that I think does a wonderful job at describing Emotional Abuse. Please feel free to review some information I took from it below or to visit the site itself at www.lilaclane.com/relationships/emotional-abuse/.

Emotional Abuse Eventually Brainwashes Victims:
Victim is unaware of what is going on and what is taking place.
Victim is unable to control his or her own time or physical environment, and is pushed to change behaviors.
Victim has a sense of powerlessness, fear, and dependency.
Victim has new attitudes and behaviors instilled in them.
Victim is allowed no real input or criticism.

Common Characteristics of Abusers:
Was or witnessed verbal abuse as a child.
Has an explosive temper.
Possessive & jealous.
Sense of masculinity depends on the woman's dependence of him.
Superficial relationships with others.
Low self-esteem.
Rigid expectations of marriage that he will not compromise.
Great capacity for self-deception.
Dual personalities.
Easily deceives others.

Effects of Long-Term Emotional & Verbal Abuse on Victim's:
Isolation
Low Self-Esteem
Depression
Emotional Problems
Illness
Increased Alcohol/Drug Use
Withdrawal from Real Life

Paint it Purple Party, ASC & Del Norte Homecoming

I've been so busy!!! Sorry it's been a while since my last post.
On Saturday, October 9th, I hosted a private Paint it Purple party in my home. The turnout was not what I had hoped for because of illness and end of the season camping trips. Everyone was wanting to enjoy their last weekend outdoors before winter arrives. For those who did make it to the party, we had a great time. We had confetti cupcakes with purple icing and the white & purple domestic violence ribbon on top. Everyone in attendance dressed in purple for the ocassion. There were also a number of children in attendance, so after dinner I read them one of the two books that I have purchased to read at the schools, "A Family that Fights". The kids asked questions throughout the story, but were more eager to have cupcakes after the story than they were to discuss the book any further. Thank you to everyone who came to the party. The church I attend allowed me to decorate the church with purple in recognition of domestic violence awareness and I took the left over cupcakes to church the following morning for our fellowship after the service.
On the morning of October 9th, I also attended and participated in the Adams State College Homecoming Parade. I enjoyed this parade very much for a number of reasons. It was great to not only represent as Mrs. San Luis Valley and promote my platform, I also felt I was representing my school, as I am a Master's student in Adams' Clinical Mental Health program. I also felt honored to meet the Third District of Colorado Congressman, John Salazar; who is a valley native, while lining up for the parade. This was very exciting for me!!!
On Thursday, October 14th, I participated in the Del Norte High School Homecoming Parade. This was fun because not only was I in the parade and once again promoting my platform, my daughter was in the parade for the first time. It is a Del Norte tradition for the Kindergarteners to march in the parade showing their spirit dressed in orange, black, and white. We had so much fun and all the kids at school that it was cool that their friends mom is a "princess". LOL
Be sure to check the photo page of my website for pictures of these events and more at http://www.heathermeyer.net/.

KSLV Interview

Tune in to KSLV for my interview and discussion on domestic violence awareness. The inteview starts at 10 a.m. on Friday, October 1st.

"You are the embodiment of the information you choose to accept and act upon. To change your circumstances you need to change your thinking and subsequent actions." Adlin Sinclair

Dating Abuse

FACTS
1 in 3 teens are abused in a relationship.
Only 33% of teens in an abusive relationship reported the abuse.
Teen victims of dating violence are more likely to abuse drugs, have eating disorders, and attempt suicide.
Dating violence is the leading cause of injury to young women.
About 40% of teenage girls 14 to 17 say they know someone their age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend.
Approximately 68% of young women rape victims knew their rapists either as a boyfriend, friend, or casual acquaintance.
Females 20-24 are at the greatest risk for intimate partner violence.

SIGNS OF AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
Any kind of physical violence or the threat of physical violence.
Emotional or mental abuse (i.e.: mind games, making you feel crazy, yelling at you, criticizing you, putting you down).
Sexual abuse (i.e.: forcing you into any type of sexual activity, refusing safe sex, making you feel bad about yourself sexually).

PHYSICAL EFFECTS OF ABUSE
42% of women and 20% of abused men sustaing the following injuries:
Scratches
Bruises
Swelling
Lesions
Cuts
Broken Bones
Gynecological Injuries

PHYSIOLOGICAL EFFECTS
Depression and Anxiety
Suicidal Behavior
Low Self-Esteem
Sleep Disturbances
Inability to Concentrate

SOCIAL EFFECTS
Controlled access to services meant to help the victim.
Isolation from family, friends, and supportive individuals.
Changes in behavior at school

HOW TO HELP SOMEONE BEING ABUSED
Speak Up - Talk to people if you suspect a friend is being abused or speak to the friend themself.
Be Sensitive - Try to understand their feelings and be respectful to their decision.
Listen - Sometimes just listening and being supportive is best.
Be There For Them - Encourage them to spend time with you, other friends, and family. Get them excited about doing things outside of the relationship.
Connect Them to Resources - Sometimes victims don't realize they are being abused. Send them websites, links, and information.
Stay With Them - If they decide to leave the abuser, be there for them to help them through the process and healing.

Music/Music Videos

I was listening to Eminem & Rihanna's controversial song, "Love the Way You Lie" today and it made me realize that more and more artists are trying to bring awareness to domestic violence, some intentionally and some unintentionally. I know there are a number of people who are Eminem fans and a number who aren't. Either way and regardless of whether or not you like the song, I can't help but think how Eminem perfectly describes the cycle of domestic violence, "Cause when it's good, It's going great...But when it's bad, It's awful...I laid hands on her, I'll never stoop so low again...You swore you'd never hit em, Never do nothing to hurt em...You push, pull each others hair, scratch, claw, bit em, throw em down, pin em...It's the rage that took over, It controls you both...But you promised her next time you'd show restraint...We fall back into the same patterns the same routines...Next time, There won't be a next time, I apologize even though I know it's lies". Not sure if it's true or not, but I had read (I believe in Rolling Stone) that this song was actually written with Rihanna in mind. I also read, that the music video to the song was not created to represent Eminem or Rihanna and their relationships. Rather, the video (which features Megan Fox) represents any two individuals anywhere who are in a violent relationship. I have to say, whether these artists have written/sang these songs to intentionally shed some light on the subject or not; I have to give props to those who are bringing this tragic cycle into awareness. Who better to speak out about domestic violence (other than victims) than celebrities that we all look up to. With that said, here is a list of songs and music video links in which domestic violence is discussed or implied.

Love the Way You Lie - Eminem & Rihanna    
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uelHwf8o7_U&ob=av2e

I'm Okay - Christina Aguilera
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxeHfB-udlI

Face Down - Red Jumpsuit Apperatace
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Ux6SlOE9Qk&ob=av2e

Tell Me Why - Taylor Swift
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MRlzn-Dz6yc

Independence Day - Martina McBride
http://www.cmt.com/videos/martina-mcbride/55392/independence-day.jhtml

Family Portrait - Pink
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSjIz8oQuko

Because of You - Kelly Clarkson & Reba McIntire
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0oenkCT8EY

Black Eyes Blue Tears - Shania Twain
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3LL0K1rudAw

Hands Clean - Alanis Morisette
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GP_yr-UA7E&ob=av2e

Goodbye Earl - Dixie Chicks (This one tries to make light of the issue, but discusses it)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gw7gNf_9njs

Evangeline - Little Big Town
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6R_A1X_cJI

It Stops With Us - J-Saint
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kroz7SmSLTw

"Paint it Purple" Parties

Throw a "Paint it Purple" party to help promote Domestic Violence Awareness. I will be throwing a private party for my family and friends on October 9th.

What is the "Paint it Purple" Campaign?
"Paint it Purple" is a campaign to take Domestic Violence Awareness Month Worldwide in October 2010. The campaign's aim is to raise global awareness about Violence Against Women through a social media campaign and to raise funds for The Pixel Project.

Throw your own party, decorate in purple and white, bake purple and white cupcakes, wear purple, and record a short PSA to be uploaded to YouTube and help "Paint it Purple" this October.

For more information on the "Paint it Purple" Campaign visit http://www.thepixelproject.net/.

Inspirational Quotes

For anyone who may need some inspiration or hope, I hope you find these quotes as inspirational as I did.

"The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself." Mark Caine – author

"Real confidence comes from knowing and accepting yourself- your strengths and your limitations –in contrast to depending on affirmation from others." Judith Bardwick- the Plateauing Trap 8, 1988

"Every woman who thinks she is the only victim of violence has to know that there are many more."
– Salma Hayek

"Non-violence can truly flourish when the world is free of poverty, hunger, discrimination, exclusion, intolerance and hatred – when women and men can realize their highest potential and live a secure and fulfilling life. Until then, each and every one of us would have to contribute – collectively and individually – to build peace through non-violence."
– Anwarul Chowdhury

Mrs. San Luis Valley 2010

I got the most exciting news in the mail today. I applied to compete in the Mrs. Colorado 2011 Pageant. I received notification that I have been awarded the title of Mrs. San Luis Valley 2010 and will be competing for the title of Mrs. Colorado 2011 in March. I look forward to this exciting adventure and hope that through my platform, I can help spread awareness of domestic violence across the state of Colorado and the country.
Continue to check back for updates on appearances, presentations, educational information, and more.
Here's hoping that together, we can put an end to domestic violence.